DCW Launches Clothing & Fragarance Lines!

It appears that some celebrities have created alternate careers besides being a songstress, actress or socialite. So, the Dull Co-Worker (DCW) has taken it upon herself to launch two new business ventures as well! Watch out Hollywood! I'm putting Kitchener on the map!

Following the ever wise and thoroughly knowledgeable fashionistas in Hollywood, the Dull Co-Worker is going to launch a clothing line. This will certainly rival such American celebutantes who have clothing lines like Kim and Kourtney Kardashian, and the in-and-out-of-trouble-with-the-law stars Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton (note: the Dull Co-Worker is hoping there is no correlation between having a clothing line and having someone accidentally put cocaine in your purse). Other popular stars with clothing lines include J Lo, Hillary Duff and Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen.

I want to be clear that while no one from Holloywood has approached me or indicated there is a need for my fashion line, I'm pretty sure there is a gap of dull work clothes in the fashion market which I can fill. To test my theory, I Googled "dull work clothes" and to my delight found there was not one single clothing line espousing to fill this niche.

Not to slam celebrities, but their clothes cannot be worn to work for most of us who work in a dull work environment. If you wear something too flashy or "risque" in the corporate world, people (and by "people" I mean women) will talk about you behind your back or to your face and comment on the inappropriateness of your attire.

Maybe the straps on your sundress are too thin revealing too much of your shoulder (and we all know alluring those are...I think it's because they are attached to your arms???). Heaven forbid this part of your anatomy be too conspicuous when at work. Better to keep the shoulder a mystery to your co-workers (and leave them wondering if you actually have them...maybe start some rumours around the workplace..."hey Bob, I think Shelia has shoulders but I'm not sure, I've never seen them. Wish I could. Shoulders are hot!"). Anyways, we all know that inapt fashion at work could have a major negative on the share prices of your corporation and be a detriment to all stakeholders. That's pretty obvious.

The other Dull Co-Worker business venture is a fragarance line. Popular celebrity perfumes include those by J Lo, Britney, Celine, Shania, Kim Kardashian and of course, Mariah Carey. If this idea is good enough for Mariah, then count me in (after all, who doesn't respect Mariah Carey?)!

Kim Kardashian is quoted as saying she wanted "something rich and creamy and sexy, but still youthful" for her perfume line. Well, my perfume, called "Dull and Dreary" can be described as "poor, lumpy and asexual. Perfect for the boardroom or for being bored in the workplace."

Many workplaces currently have an anti-fragarance policy so my fragarance will be so non-aromatic that it will be acceptable in the workplace...it will virtually be like you're not wearing perfume at all.

So go ahead and douse your hidden shoulders with some Dull & Dreary to liven up those work meetings...while wearing your dull clothing, of course. Available soon at Wal-Mart!