Staplers - Simply Stunning

Product Review: Swingline 405

As you can see by the picture above, I have a beautiful stapler at my desk! I would like to do a product review of this stapler in case you are ever at Grand & Toy or Staples and are unsure of what to buy.

First of all, what I love about this stapler is that it works (except when it's out of staples).

I also like how it's black, which is a staple colour (not just a stapler colour!) as it goes with everything. Plus, black is slimming! I look slimmer when holding it!

That is my product review.

Oh, one more thing, as I type this, my co-worker (who is not dull), wanted me to remind you to put your name on the bottom of your stapler in case someone takes it accidentally.

Finally, I want to conclude today's post by showing you this heavy duty stapler for larger staple jobs. Beside it is an example of a box of staples. It is always good to have these around.

So my dear friends, I hope you enjoyed this product review. If you have any staplers you'd like me to review that I didn't mention, please let me know.

Oh yes, this is about the stupidest, dullest post I've done to date on this blog. I'm sorry you wasted 5 min's or less of your life reading this. Sorry for your life.

Big Calves & High Boots: The Saga Continues

Back in January I posted a blog entitled Big Calves & High Boot Don't Mix. I didn't think this would be such a big hit. Seriously, can someone tell why this post has become so popular?

I know I posted later in the year an update to my saga and did report later that I somehow lost weight in my calves so that my high boots were starting to fit better, and I could actually zip them up!

Enter, disappointment.

Last night I once again donned some high boots (which I hadn't worn in awhile) in an effort to be chic (a girl can't be dull all the time). Well, once again the cursed big calves came into play and yes, I had problems zipping up the boots. I was bound and determined though that I would not let these big calves and poorly made boots get the best of me, so I crammed every bit of my limbs into them and managed to succeed in zipping them up. Now I was in some pain, mind you, but I was not going to let them stop me!

At this point, I'm thinking I should write a Bridget Jones type diary and see if Rene Zellweger and Colin Firth could capture all of this on the big screen and bring my story to life.

Sample Screenplay:

Rene (playing me...with calf implants, of course) enters a dreary insurance cubicle (resembling my desk area) and says,
"I'm in so much pain...these bloody boots are killing me!"

Colin (playing my love interest and holding some boring insurance papers) stands there with a look of disgust and remarks,
"That is because your calves are so bloody big! It looks like you can't even zip them up all the way. Why are you even wearing those boots? Those are for skinny calved women Bridget. Your calves certainly aren't small!"

Rene (realizing that this is not yet the moment in the movie where they are about to kiss, has a look of contempt towards him and his insurance papers),
"You are such a bloody A&@! Why don't you just bugger off and leave me alone!"

Riveting, don't you think?

Stay tuned....who knows what else will happen in Bridget Jones Diary: Tales from the Big Calved Years.

Adults Being Bullied by Children: The Untold Story

WARNING: This post is very disturbing. Read at your own risk.

Today’s post will deal with a shocking and incredibly alarming new phenomenon that is sweeping across my city: adults being bullied by kids.

Here is my interview with one of the victims of bullying...my forty-something best friend forever (BFF).

DCW: I hear you were recently bullied two times within the same week by children, is that correct?

BFF: That is correct.

DCW: Do you mind if I ask you some questions about it or is it too painful?

BFF: No. A week has passed and the wounds are healing so we can talk about it.

DCW: Tell me what happened on the evening of April 18th?

BFF: I was walking with a friend and we were talking, and I was looking at the people in the yard. This little girl, who looked 7 or 8, had a plastic gun. She looked menacing. She was smart enough to know not to say whatever she was saying out loud as her mother was there and she mouthed the words (not sure what she said) but she snarled when she said it and pointed the gun at me. She was mocking me but I have no idea what she said.

DCW: That is very disturbing.

BFF: Yes

DCW: How did you react?

BFF: I was trying to figure out what she was saying. At first I thought she was cute and was saying something playful until I realized she wasn’t.

DCW: What was the second incident?

BFF: I was walking alone and there were a bunch of kids out playing and one little boy said “hi” and so I responded saying “hi” then another kid said “bye” so I said “bye” and then a third kid said “yeah, your blond is real” and I didn’t respond. What was I to say? “Thanks”? I had no idea so I kept walking. (Note: my BFF has blond highlights. She is now insecure about them).

DCW: Does this make you not want to go for a walk?

BFF: Every time I go on those routes I am very thankful when those kids aren’t out.

DCW: Do you think you would ever say anything to the kids if you saw them again?

BFF: Well, I don’t think I should be bullying kids. Its’ not a good practice.

DCW: Do you think you’ll wear a ball cap to cover your highlights the next time you go on that route?

BFF: I did think of that. My other thought was just to say “thank you.”

If you or an adult you know has been bullied by a child and have been keeping this a secret, know you are not alone. I have started the Adults-Against-Adults-Being-Bullied-By-Children-In-Canada-And-Around-The-World support group. The problem is real and help is available.