Big Calves & High Boots: The Saga Continues

Back in January I posted a blog entitled Big Calves & High Boot Don't Mix. I didn't think this would be such a big hit. Seriously, can someone tell why this post has become so popular?

I know I posted later in the year an update to my saga and did report later that I somehow lost weight in my calves so that my high boots were starting to fit better, and I could actually zip them up!

Enter, disappointment.

Last night I once again donned some high boots (which I hadn't worn in awhile) in an effort to be chic (a girl can't be dull all the time). Well, once again the cursed big calves came into play and yes, I had problems zipping up the boots. I was bound and determined though that I would not let these big calves and poorly made boots get the best of me, so I crammed every bit of my limbs into them and managed to succeed in zipping them up. Now I was in some pain, mind you, but I was not going to let them stop me!

At this point, I'm thinking I should write a Bridget Jones type diary and see if Rene Zellweger and Colin Firth could capture all of this on the big screen and bring my story to life.

Sample Screenplay:

Rene (playing me...with calf implants, of course) enters a dreary insurance cubicle (resembling my desk area) and says,
"I'm in so much pain...these bloody boots are killing me!"

Colin (playing my love interest and holding some boring insurance papers) stands there with a look of disgust and remarks,
"That is because your calves are so bloody big! It looks like you can't even zip them up all the way. Why are you even wearing those boots? Those are for skinny calved women Bridget. Your calves certainly aren't small!"

Rene (realizing that this is not yet the moment in the movie where they are about to kiss, has a look of contempt towards him and his insurance papers),
"You are such a bloody A&@! Why don't you just bugger off and leave me alone!"

Riveting, don't you think?

Stay tuned....who knows what else will happen in Bridget Jones Diary: Tales from the Big Calved Years.