Perplexing Remarks

My post from October 23rd (How to Make Enemies at Work) got me thinking about other comments people have made. When someone makes a statement, sometimes I'm perplexed on how to respond as I'm not sure if it's a compliment, an insult or just an observation.

Maybe the intention is to give a compliment but the way it's said makes me wonder if it's an insult or just an observation. I hesitate to say "thank you” because then I'd feel foolish if it's not a compliment (case in point, Oct 23 blog).

But then I'm afraid that if the person did intend to give me a compliment and I didn’t thank them, I could be perceived as being rude. Then, I just start feeling annoyed that I'm even in this predicament in the first place.

Here are some examples from my life:

Example #1: "Your hair looks different"

Does this mean “I love your hair” or "I really don't think your hair looks good at all and I can't believe you are walking around with that hairstyle" or “Thank goodness you changed your hair because it looked hideous before” or “I don’t normally check you out this much but now I am and I need your confirmation that you look different than you did yesterday.”

Example #2: "That's a bright coat/dress/shirt"

I never know how to respond to this. What I'd like to say is "Yes, compared to your drab outfit that makes you barely indistinguishable from these gray walls, my outfit is bright.”

Example #3: "Your eyes are really blue"

Did these people have colour recognition issues as children and thus require constant reassurance they can correctly identify colours??? Are they looking me to say "Good job! Yes, the colour is blue not green or brown. Now let's move on to discuss shapes....here is an example of a circle....”