Monday, November 1, 2010

Sign Me Up For More Sinus Cold Medication

Sinus cold medication is my new friend. Let me tell you why. It makes work seem awesome.

Last week I made the important realization that when I am on non-drowsy, generic, sinus cold medication, I actually enjoy being at work. It feels like being slightly tipsy. It’s a feeling of serenity and calm. Maybe this is what all those people who meditate experience.

Normal work irritants seem trivial and are certainly not worth getting upset about. I appreciate my co-workers in a whole new way…I love them all! I am funnier and can easily laugh at my own “jokes” (when I say “jokes” I mean anything that I consider funny which can be just about anything; as I mentioned in other posts, I have a predisposition towards laughing at my own “jokes” but the cold medicine just enhances this characteristic).

Also, creative thoughts seem to flow out of me. I came up with brilliant slogans for some of our insurance products even though this has nothing to do with my job. Clearly, I am a blessing to my company when I am on this type of cold medication.

The moral of the story is the next time you feel you’re getting sick and you’re all bummed out because your body feels like crap, take some non-drowsy, cheap, no-name brand of cold relief medicine and experience the wonderment of these drugs. See how they mix beautifully with your work. Although I have to admit, it might be a good idea to have a colleague read all emails you send while on these drugs.

Coming Soon: the DCW ponders profound questions such as why can we put people into space but we can’t make a cough syrup that doesn’t taste awful? What does this say about us a species? What is wrong with us???? And how can you really describe it as “cherry” flavoured? Isn’t that an insult to cherries everywhere?

Alert! These are not the same!

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